jofo wrote:
"Smelly goat knows no god other than himself."
https://medium.com/@rickygoodallhfx/alone-forever-how-mother-ayahuasca-helped-me-remember-who-i-am-117c3305c2a0
Hahaha.
As I started reading this article, the first thing the guy says is he wants to drink enough to never drink it again.
I swear to god I said the same thing almost before I stopped drinking.
Um, jofo, you know, in one strike, you hit the target
center.
Because this is kinda what I came to as well and why I stopped drinking.
But the devil told me.
I chalked it up to hallucination.
But god, did I touch that loneliness, I ran away from it.
That’s why all Dan’s friends are nothing to me.
Absolutely nothing.
The whole world was swallowed up in a moment.
Like being sucked under the ocean in a whirlpool.
I knew all this lovey dovey bliss was a crock.
I didn’t make too much of realizing what being is.
But it hurt bad to be nothing and nowhere.
Nothing and nowhere, but you could still feel and were aware of it all.
Hell.
On with the show.
Cause what does it matter what I do or say or anyone else?
So yah, not too warm and fuzzy.
From there, you begin to see through everything.
But if you don’t kill yourself, you find something, this pearl they kept talking about.
I keep mine close to my heart.
It’s all I got left.
And no one can have it.
I don’t EVER want to smell or taste that stuff ever again!!!!
It’s horrible!
I wanna puke 🤮 just thinking about it.
Why did Eric drink so much?!
Poor kid.
He had no idea what he was doing.
Like a kid going to war with no clue.
Hahaha, those were fun times.
I was just like, fuck it!
Let’s take it full blast.
Then I met the devil
and a very powerful woman.
She was fierce like Cy, but so loving, I won’t ever forget.
I’m sure Cy is a very loving mother.
Due to my mommy issues, the irony meeting someone like Cy was interesting after the Aya woman.
A surrogate for me for sure.
Fighting with Cy was my favorite part here.
I guess the Aya woman was my version of my true mother.
A bitch and a beauty, no offense Cy.
But my mother is a ranting woman too.
It’s creepy.
Let me see the left feet, we seem to have many left feet spying on omf, do the same!
I dare you!
They can’t, they have too much to lose.
They can’t stand where I have been or they would risk losing what little they have left.
This is also why I don’t care about disclosure or any idealist ideas about life.
I would warn people not to do what I did.
Relax and have fun.
Don’t hurt people, only hurting yourself.
Do you really want a cosmic reset?
I don’t think you would if you knew what was on the other side.
My experience, ymmv.
Man, you triggered so many flashbacks jofo.
I think I have to go puke now.
Last edited by Smelly El Chivo on Wed Jun 09, 2021 2:50 pm; edited 1 time in total
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